0.8
quick little note, i am doing the rest of this book in lower case letters only because i like the way it looks
.....
r i l e y
i'm still processing what happened last night. his face close to mine. the only thing that i am sort of sure about is that I feel something towards lucas beyond platonic.
although the feelings aren't platonic, i'm not really sure how far the feelings go. of course i love him, even if the feelings were platonic i would still love him. i'm not sure if i'm in love with him. i'm not even sure if he feels the same way. for all i know, he could have feelings for maya again. if he does, i won't stop it because as long as he's happy and maya is happy, who am i to stop it?
that's when i notice someone at my doorframe. i see the dirty blonde teenage boy.
"hey," i smile at him.
"hi," he smiles back.
"what's going on?" i ask.
"just wanted to talk," he answers
"about....." what did he want to talk about? last night? me? maya? caleb?
"i don't know, something, nothing, anything really," he looks down at his feet.
"oh, okay. well sorry about um the whole caleb thing," i manage to get out. what i really wanted to talk about was the thing that happened last night when we got home.
"oh um it's okay, really." he replies.
"i feel really bad though," i reply looking down at my feet.
"it's not your fault riley, you're the last person i would blame for what happened last night." he says ad i can't help but blush at that.
"about what happened last night-"
"yeah, i wasn't thinking so just forget anything i said, it did mean anything." he interrupts me.
well that hurts, to know that the guy you have feelings for doesn't feel anything but platonic feelings towards you. maybe he's right. maybe it was a mistake. maybe there's a reason that we didn't work out the first time and it's a sign that we should just stay friends. where's charlie gardner when you need him? if lucas and i were meant to be together, we would be together and he never would've left.
"oh okay, yeah w-we probably should," i stutter hiding my sadness.
"i mean brother and sister right?" he says.
"yeah, yeah brother and sister." i reply. "hey you wanna do something today?" i ask.
"can't," he answers.
"why?" i ask.
"i have a thing with a uh friend," he replys.
"oh okay." i reply. he could be something with say are farkle, but if he was, why can he say their name and not "a uh friend"?
"riley, you okay?" my head snaps up. i guess while thinking i didn't realize he was still in the room.
"uh yeah i'm just gonna call maya." i reply and push him out my room and close the door right in front on his face. i grab my phone and dial maya's phone number.
"hello," i hear maya's voice through that phone.
"hey peaches, i was wondering if you would like to hang out today," i respond.
"yikes sorry i can't," she replies. her too?
"why?" i ask.
"i have a thing with a friend," she responds. i can put two and two together. i'm not going to pretend that i don't see any connections between what they're saying. obviously they're going to be hanging out together.
"oh okay have fun," i say and hang up the phone. are they going to go on a date or something? if they are, why are they keeping it from me? to not cause drama?maybe they know that i have feelings for lucas so they're keeping it a secret.
"hey lucas!" i yell and he quickly runs through the door.
"is everything okay?" he asks.
"yeah i just wanted to help you get ready for your thing with your friend." i reply.
"um okay?" he responds. i simply grab his arm and we walk into his room. i grab out a nice shirt, pants, and find some nice smelling cologne, not that he needs it. if this is a date, he has to look good.
"here put these one," i hand him everything and exit the room. when he finished i walked back into the room to see a good looking lucas. "you look great," i say.
"couldn't have done it with out you," he responds which makes my cheeks heat up. we both just sit down on his bed for a bit. for some odd reason, i just kept looking at his guitar. the green eyed boy must have noticed because he then asked me if i wanted him to show me more things on the guitar, which i quickly accepted. he stands up and gets the guitar and sits right next to me. he sits the bigger part of the guitar on my lap and he has the stem.
"okay so i'll teach you 'twinkle twinkle little star'" he says. "okay so it's starts in a g chord," he puts his fingers on the correct strings and i strum.
eventually we finish it and i do my lay strum and we're both laughing.
"i think guitar should always be a two person instrument," i smile and look at him.
"well it depends on the two people," he looks at me too. we just sat there looking at each other. i looked at at his green eyes, his perfect nose, his sharp jawline, then, my eyes gazed at his lips and it took everything in my to not kiss him. then, his phone goes off. "i got to go," he says and leaves.
with that, i'm all alone.
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word count: 1018
hey guys sorry for being MIA for like 2 or 3 months, school has started and it has been kicking my butt but now i'm back and im going to try to update more. my sister is on the computer 24/7 so i might not update that fast. anyways that you guys!!!!!
Caroline :)
