four.
"So maybe Zayn and Lauren can singing the first hook, and Jilly can do the backing vocals, and then Jilly and Zayn, and Lauren doing the backing vocals." The producer came up with an idea and told us. Obviously what we were doing wasn't working out and all it was doing was causing frustration.
Jilly and I agreed on the idea, and she left the booth and went to go sit with Normani. "Whenever you two are ready." The producer told me and Zayn.
I took a deep breath before starting, and playing with my fingers. Zayn nudged me gently in my arm, catching my attention. "You got this." He smiled, winking at me.
I reciprocated the smile and nodded ready to start.
Baby, is you drunk cause you had enough?
Are you here lookin' for love? Ohh
Got the club goin' crazy
All these bitches, but my eyes on you
Is you somebody's baby?
If you ain't, girl what we gon' do?
If you gon' need it, baby
Give it all up for you right now
We got the club goin' crazy
All eyes on you
I only sang the first couple of lines, and a few other lines. It turned out better than I expected, but we were told to run it again.
"Hey Lauren," my A&R, Anika, called my name. "Try not to hit that high note too hard. Just be smooth with it. You got this."
I nodded, and licked my lips before starting it over. When we got to the part, I took Anika's advice and it actually sounded better than before. A small grin formed on the corner of my lips afterwards, since I got a pleasant reaction from everyone in the the studio.
Zayn took his headphones off when we finished the hook, and he nudged me. "That was amazing Lauren. I knew you could do it." He smiled, throwing his hand up for a high five.
"Well, I try." I smirked adding on a little laugh.
"Enough flirting you two, let's get back to business, I'm on a schedule." The producer announced to us.
I got out of the booth and now it was Zayn's verse. I took a seat next to Normani, as well listened to Zayn and he added a few lyrics here and there. Once he was finished with his part, Jilly went in with him and recorded their hook together.
"Are you excited?" Normani slightly leaned next to me and asked.
"For?"
"To be making a comeback, putting your voice on a track. A collaboration with Zayn Malik." She said to me excitedly, not taking her eyes off the male singer.
I shrugged my shoulders as I bit down on my bottom lip. "This wasn't really my ideal comeback. I wanted to do something original. If that makes sense." I mentioned, Normani looking at me intently. "It's a blessing to be on a song with you guys though, don't get me wrong." I clarified and Normani nodded understandably.
"You just want to make your album already?" She asked, already knowing that I've been wanting to record this album, but I can't without having a good reason for Scooter.
"Yeah." I replied, frowning a bit.
"Alright, you guys can take five before Normani comes in." The producer let us have a break, and I went out of the studio down to the little cafeteria they had.
I brought my notebook, and tried to right down a few lyrics, maybe possibly just record a song to release.
I tried to jot down a few lyrics, but it sounded terrible. I erased my lyrics so much, holes in the paper started forming.
"Tea?" A voice said, holding a cup in front of me. I looked up and saw Normani hovering over me. I smiled at her and grabbed the drink, but much rather have an alcoholic beverage than this.
"What are you doing?" She asked, staring at the messed up piece of journal paper.
I chuckled and ripped out the paper. "Trying to write a song, but it's not coming along." I frowning, looking over at her.
"You have to be inspired babe," She said, drinking her tea. "You ain't going to get anything if you aren't inspired." She mentioned.
She did have a point. I had to be inspired, and I honestly wasn't inspired at all. I was just writing to write. All I wanted was to have something out, but it would have no inspiration or meanings behind it.
She shuffled through my journal, and grabbed it. She looked through pages that were filled with lyrics, and read some of them. "Lauren, these are amazing!" She said, reading through the lyrics. "Why are you writing a new song that you're struggling with, when you have songs with beautiful lyrics right here?"
"I don't want to release those." I said bluntly, grabbing the notebook from her as she read them.
"Why? That's your album right there?"
I wondered if I should tell Normani the reason why I didn't want to record those songs. I wanted to tell her, but then again, I didn't really want to.
"I want my album to go in a different direction." I lied, but somewhat told the truth. I wrote those songs a couple years ago, they may have been good lyrically, but I've changed from those songs. It wouldn't really make sense if I had songs that didn't really explain what I'm going through at the moment.
"Understandable." She commented. She looked at the time on her phone and said it was time for us to go back to the studio.
"I'll catch up with you." I told her, walking back towards the snack bar and grabbing a coffee since it was late and I need some energy.
"Hey Lauren," I turned around, and saw Zayn lightly jogging up to me. "It's a pleasure working with such a beautiful girl like you." He stated, smiling at me.
"Thank you, same to you." I reciprocated, sipping on the hot drink after. I spit out the drink in front of me, wiping my top lip. "Fuck that's hot." I cursed, dabbing my tongue with a napkin.
Zayn laughed, and handed me a water that had been in his hand. "You just got this though?" I said, my tongue hanging out of my mouth.
"The studio has more." He informed me, waving his hand dismissively.
He held the studio door open for me, and I smiled at his generosity. Walking in, Normani was doing her verse, and everyone ooed at her rhymes, and clapped. She was a powerful rapper, and everything she did was original and written by her, and that's what I like about Normani.
She placed her headphones on the mic, and when she looked up, her face softened, and she looked innocent. Before, while she was rapping, she'd raise the corner of her top lip, and have like this face that made her seem hard. Then when she'd finish, it's like I'm looking at a little girl.
"Normani, that was hella amazing!" Jilly told her, giving her a high five as she came out of the booth.
Everyone agreed with Jilly and Normani smiled. "Thank you, thank you." She said, tossing her hair over her shoulder, then laughing afterwards.
"Now, all we have to do is put the finishing touches on it, then we're all set." The producer exclaimed to us, rocking in his care.
We stayed in the studio for a couple of hours, adding stuff in here and there, and changing up the lyrics as we went. I was surprised with how good the song was. It was a fun experience for me, and it was something different than what I would normally record.
Afterwards, I decided to hang out with Zayn. He took me to the club, since he wanted to get to know me a little better.
"Indie artist goes pop, that's something a little new." He projected his voice, leaning into me.
I shrugged my shoulders finding it quite odd, but I didn't have a problem with it. "I guess, it's good to try new things."
"I've always wanted to work with you. You just happened to be one of my favorite artist, and I was excited to be working with you." He smiled.
"We were supposed to do a song together earlier, but the label wouldn't let it happen." I said rolling my eyes.
Earlier, just when Zayn was coming out, the label thought it would be a perfect idea if I had a song with him. We recorded the song, but not in the same studio. He did his parts and I did mine, we were just waiting for label to finish up on their end. The label said they "heard" the song and suggested that we didn't release it. It wasn't "good" enough for them.
"What's happened with that by the way?" He furrowed his brows.
"The label was being stupid that's all." I mentioned, waving my hand dismissively on the subject since I didn't want to talk about it.
I actually had a fun time with Zayn. He was a really out going guy and very good looking. My phone happened to die, so I couldn't call an Uber to come and pick me up. So Zayn happened to be nice enough and give me a ride home.
There was so many paparazzi outside of the club, I could barely see. Zayn had been far in front of me, and he pushed through his body guards, just to come and guide me. He held my hand so I wouldn't get lost, and it actually made things a lot easier for me.
We got into his van and he slammed his door shut. "Fuckin' paps, man." He sighed annoyedly, sinking down into his seat. "I can never get a break."
"They're crazy assholes." I rolled my eyes, looking outside the tinted window, and seeing them all crowd around the car.
"Luckily, I have this." He said, pressing a button, rolling up a partition. "Don't worry Paul, we aren't doing anything, we just don't want pictures taken." He told his driver.
"Understandable, Mr. Malik."
"Thanks for giving me a ride home." I thanked him, looking over at him, and meeting his gaze.
"No problem," he smiled at me. "I heard you might drop an album?"
"Just a rumor," I clarified. "I'm not dropping anything anytime soon." I frowned.
"What? Why not?" He said in disbelief.
"I need inspiration and shockingly, I'm not inspired by anything."
"I get you. Maybe I can help you out sometime?" He smirked.
"Maybe you could." I replied, biting the bottom of my lip.
We arrived at my apartment, and he walked me up to my door. "It was nice hanging out with you and working with you." I told him, leaning against the wall.
There was a small space between us, that was probably at two inches. I looked up and met his gaze, realizing that his arm had been by the side of my head.
"You're beautiful." He said softly, "it was great hanging out with you as well." He said, leaning forward.
My lip quivered a bit until his met mine. He kissed me gently, and slowly. I was actually shocked by what he did, not really expecting it. He pulled away and smiled before leaving.
I furrowed my brows, shaking my head at what just happened. I fumbled with my keys, and as I entered my apartment, and Keana came up to me and kissed me. "You were gone for a while." She said, pulling away, and wrapping her arms around my neck. "Where were you?" She asked, tilting her head.
"Um, my phone died, I went overtime, we had to add somethings to the song." I stammered, pushing her off me gently as I walked to the kitchen.
"Well, I was waiting for you." She told me, wrapping her arms around my waist, as I poured me something to drink. "I was thinking we could go in the room." She said softly, the warmth of her breath ran across my neck.
She ran her fingers up my shirt, placing her hand on my sides.
As much as I wanted too, so much had been running through my mind, I couldn't do that to her. Especially after I kissed Zayn. "You know what Keana," I said, turning around and facing her. "As much as I would like too, I would much rather sleep. It's been a long day." I mentioned to her.
She pouted, and watched me out the corner of her eye. "Everything okay?" She asked, placing her hair in a ponytail.
"Yeah, just tired."
"Alright, I'll be in there in a few." She stammered a bit, sounding confused. She was onto me, I just couldn't let anything slip.
Once I got out of the shower, I went and laid down next to her. She had already been asleep, so I tried my best not to wake her up.
I couldn't sleep at all. Majority of the time, I stared at my ceiling. My mind was just running about every little thing. It ran about my album, my comeback, what people would think of me, if people would still like me, and also Zayn.
I want my album to be perfect. I want to explain what I'm going through, but I just can't put anything into words. If I do, it just sounds like a mess and I can't piece things together.
Forty minutes around three in the morning, there was a knock on the door. I picked up the bat that rested next to the door, and I slowly turned the nob, preparing myself for whoever this was behind the door.
"Dammit Normani," I sighed relievedly, and placed the bat back down against the wall. "You could've called." I said, running my hand through my hair.
"I should've if I was going to be greeted by you with a bat." She said, making her way into my apartment. "I just came for some advice." She sat down on my couch and faced me.
"What's wrong?" I asked, sitting across from her, making sure the bedroom door was shut.
"It's just," she paused. "Shit, I don't need advice, I just wanted to see you." She mentioned.
I laughed and shook my head, surprised at her words. "You wanted to see me?" She nodded her head and smiled. "That's appreciative." I smiled.
"I was thinking about you, I thought I should stop by."
"Usually people call before they stop by, but I guess it's more of a surprise if you don't call." I joked, shrugging my shoulders.
She covered her mouth and laughed lightly. She turned and looked in the kitchen, and pointed her thumb behind her. "Can I?" She asked for permission to go in there.
"Sure."
I watched as she made her way to refrigerator and looked for something to drink, but all she saw was milk. She opened the freezer and grinned. She just so happened to pull out my ice cream that I had been hiding.
Then she searched the drawers for a spoon.
"Next to the dish washer." I informed her, smiling at how frustrated she seemed.
Once she found them, she came back, handing me a spoon. "Singers are supposed to have dairy." I said, meeting her gaze.
"People aren't suppose to smoke, but I guess they do it anyways huh?" She asserted, arching her brow.
I didn't say anything back to her and I just took the spoon from her. She laughed, taking a seat, closer than she was to me before.
"You want to watch a movie?"
"Netflix and chill? Listen Lauren, I am not going to one of your little hook ups. I know what chilling evolves to for you." She said, putting a spoonful of mint chocolate chip
ice cream in her mouth.
"Calm down," I said holding my hands up in front of me. "I was just trying to be an entertaining host."
"I'm kidding," she laughed. "It's totally up to you if you want to watch a movie."
I smiled and clicked on the tv. I searched for a movie, and every movie I went by, Normani would say "ooh, that one!" "No, that one!" "They have that one now? Pick that one!"
We finally came across a perfect movie and it was A Walk to Remember. We both sat back, eating ice cream and enjoying the movie.
"That's nearly impossible not to fall in love with someone," Normani said. "Like I can't just out of the blue tell someone 'as long as you promise me you won't fall in love with me', because you never know. Especially if they're cute and we hang out almost everyday."
"You do have a point." I mentioned, licking the ice cream off the corner of my lip. "But sometimes, it depends if you're in a relationship or not."
"They'd be so cute together," she fake cried.
"Keep watching the movie and you'll actually start crying." I informed her.
Around the end of the movie, my eyes started to water. I tried my best to hold back my tears. Turning my head multiple times, trying to hide the fact that I'm crying.
Normani looked over at me and I hid my face from her. "Are you crying too?" She asked me, placing her hand on my back.
"No, just allergies." I lied, wiping my eyes. "Damn, allergies." I said, sitting up and looking at Normani.
She had tears in her eyes too, and we both laughed at each other. "Want to watch a different movie?" I suggested, going through the selections of movies. She agreed, and we finally found another movie.
"21 Jump Street. Nice." She sniffled.
"You don't like it?"
"No I do." She chuckled. "Channing Tatum is just hot." She mumbled.
I shook my head at her, and went into the kitchen. I had another bin of ice cream, and grabbed that since this one was all milk. "Do you like chocolate and vanilla?" I asked her.
"Yeah," she chuckled, grabbing the bin from me and taking off the lid. "Looks like we're going to be eating ice cream all night and watching movies." She said.
"Pretty much." I commented, scooping some ice cream as well.
Later on during the movie, both me and Normani had been quiet. She finally broke the silence. "Hey, can I try something?" She asked.
"Sure, what is it?" I said, worried about what she was going to do.
"I heard ice cream taste ten times better when someone feeds it to you." She smirked, scooping a small amount of it out the bin.
"You want to feed it to me?"
She nodded, holding the spoon in front of my lips. "Then you do the same back to me."
"Okay then," I said. "Wait," she paused, the spoon a couple inches from my lips. "Did you do something to this while I was looking away?"
"If I did, why would I suggest you feed it back to me?" She questioned.
"True." I shrugged.
She gently put the spoon in my mouth, letting me get a taste of it. "Does it?" She asked playfully.
I nodded and smiled. "Surprisingly, it does. My turn." I grinned, scooping some as well.
I reciprocated what she did with me, and she also said it does taste better. "Whoever told me that was right. I wouldn't expect them to be right, but I guess they were." She shrugged.
Later on, the tv was off, and it was just me and Normani. We had finished off the ice cream, and decided not to eat anything else. She noticed a picture on my tv stand, and walked over to it. I put out my cigarette, and noticed she had been looking a picture of me and my previous girlfriend.
"I didn't know you knew Camila Cabello." She said in shock, picking up the picture and examining it.
"Are you serious or are you just saying that?" I questioned, arching my brow.
"No I'm serious. By the looks of it, you guys were close." She said, placing the picture down.
"We were. Actually, we were dating."
"Really?!" She said in disbelief, looking back at me.
"Well yeah," I chuckled. "She was my first actual relationship. Like I mean, I never really dated anyone. I talked to people more. Then with her, I dated her."
"For how long?"
"This year would've been our third year."
"I'm sorry about what happened. I heard she passed away, but I never knew the details about it." She said, sitting down next to me.
"These idiots were speed racing, and they happened to run a red light, the idiot took her out, and it just happened right there." I said, trying not to say the word 'died'.
"Oh my gosh," she gasped. "I'm sorry."
"I didn't believe it at first," I started, remembering that night so well. "I was waiting for her since we were going on a date, and I got a text saying she was in a car accident and she had-" I spotted and looked down.
Normani placed her hand on my back, and comforted me. "I know."
"And, I went to where she was, I thought this was just a set up and she was fucking with me as usual," I lightly chuckled. "But once I got there, I saw everything."
Normani didn't respond. She looked at me intensely and scooted closer to me.
"The only thing I didn't see was that fucker that did it." I cursed.
"Do you know who did it?" She asked, pushing a stand of my hair behind my ear.
"No, I wanted to figure out who did it so badly, but I just couldn't. I didn't want to get out of bed. That's the reason why I kinda went downhill. I was affected by it." I told her. "And I still am." I said softly.
"I understand," she said. "Listen mama, you can't let these people get to you. They don't know what you go through, they just want to break you. You can't let that happen."
"It's hard because I get enough shit from my mom. The last person I want to hear talk about me."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm not necessarily her favorite. Well none of her kids are. She was never happy with what I did, and she left when I was sixteen. We got into this big argument and that turned the tables. I haven't had the best relationship with her since then."
"So this is why you're having a difficult time?" I nodded my head and met Normani's gaze. "Sometimes, you just have to do what's best for you. You come first, then everybody else. These people can talk shit on you all they want, but they'll never know what it's like to be you. They aren't the ones that have all of what you just told me going on. These people just want to break you babe, you can't let that happen."
We smiled at each other, and she brought me into a hug.
"You go through a lot, especially because you're in the spotlight. But I promise, you can get through this. You'll comeback stronger than ever, and happy. Don't worry about who you have to make proud, just know that me and everyone else will be proud of you. Especially her." She said, pointing at the picture of me and Camila.
A/N : hello people! Thanks for making it to chapter four of my story. The italics are from her past, and they usually reflect on what's she's goin through at the moment. Kind of like flashbacks. If you guys are all "oh Camren is in this" or anti-Camren, it's not a Camren fic at all. It ties into the plot of the story. But I promise, Laurmani is coming soon. It's just currently rising ;)
Thanks for reading, have a wonderful day/night!
-Raven