thirty five
My heart began to race as I burst out of the doors of the hospital. Anger washed over me as my feet began to pick up speed beneath me. My chest started to rise and fall quicker and quicker as I ran. The harsh sounds of rain hitting the cars I weaved between was alarming as lightning struck in the distance. My eyes continued to water as my vision grew blurry with each step. As soon as I reached my car, I scrambled with the keys in my back pocket and finally unlocked the vehicle. As soon as my body was safely inside the car. I started the engine and just sat in silence as the tears fell. My breathing was still heavy as I gripped the steering wheel harshly.
After what felt like minutes, I took a deep breath and put the vehicle in reverse. I quickly began to drive out of the parking lot and onto the main roads. I looked beside my to see a speed limit sign that read "35". I gulped and looked forward as anger continued to bubble inside of me as I remembered my fathers words. "You're weak! He made you weak!" My foot immediately slammed down on the gas pedal as I started to grow more and more upset. My speed quickly began to pick up as I drove down the street. The speedometer soon read "80" as I made my way to my home. Blood was coursing through my veins as the thrill took over. I had never felt so much frustration and anger in my life. I couldn't stop.
My speed continued to pick up as I continued and I prayed deep down inside that I wouldn't get pulled over. Not tonight, and as I hoped, I hadn't. A ten minute drive home turned into a three minute drive.
I quickly pulled into my driveway and got out of the car as fast as I could. Soon, I found myself fumbling with my keys once again until I found my house key and let myself into the house.
Per usual, there was no one home. Taking this into consideration, I immediately rushed up to my bedroom and grabbed a black duffle bag I had sitting in the corner beside my closet. I then started to shove clothes, toiletries, and other necessities into the bag and zipped it up tightly.
My eyes continued to water as tears trailed down my cheeks. I took a good look at myself in the mirror, staring at the cuts and forming bruises on my face. My father's words cut into me deeper than any of the marks on my skin.
I slowly shook my head and grabbed my bag. I slung it behind my back and walked out of my bedroom. This is when I made the quick decision to leave the car keys on our coffee table and walk right out of my front door.
The air was cool and wet as I walked. My fists remained clenched as I cried tears of pure sadness. I couldn't manage to comprehend what had just happened. My father had promised me he would never lay a hand on me again. But of course, just like everything else in my life, I was left disappointed.
I suddenly felt drops of water trickling down my cheeks, washing away my tears. The rain poured down heavy and cold. Suddenly I heard a clap of thunder rumble through the sky and the bright, familiar flash of lightning illuminate the street in front of me. I clung to my bag tightly as I continued down the sidewalk.
My speed picked up as I felt fury coursing through my veins once again.
Soon I had broke into a full on sprint.
My lungs began to sting and my stomach started to ache as my breaths grew shorter. My feet became sore as I felt them pounding against the pavement beneath me and my vision narrowed. Soon enough, I could see a familiar house in the distance.
Ashton's.
All I wanted right now was to see my boyfriend. It still felt so strange to refer to Ashton Irwin as my boyfriend.
Before I knew it I was standing before Ashton's home. I immediately noticed his Aunt's car was missing from the driveway and Ashton's truck was parked beside the mailbox.
I felt sudden relief as I approached his front door. Then, I proceeded to knock on the door prominently. After waiting patiently for what felt like minutes, I groaned and took it upon myself to open the front door myself.
The house was musty and dark. Silence filled the rooms as I stepped further into the living room. I noticed the light to Ashton's room was on and I found myself coming closer and closer to his bedroom.
There was a large mirror in the hallway beside me when I managed to take a quick glimpse at myself. My hair was damp and the cuts on my face were still bloody and sore. My eyes were still stung from my tears, but, I didn't care. I just needed to see him.
I soon found myself standing in the doorway of his bedroom. Ashton's muscular back was turned to me as he searched his dresser for what I assumed was a shirt.
When he turned around he jumped slightly as I had startled him. Before he could get a solid look at me, he spoke up.
"Hey, where did you take that off to tonight-" before he could finish his sentence, his eyes focused on me and his emotions changed immediately as worry washed over his face. "What the hell happened to you?!" He spoke as he rushed over to me. His hand immediately cupped my cheek as his eyes searched my face and examined the blood and cuts that were inflicted on me.
I didn't speak, for some reason I couldn't manage to get my words out.
"Shannon, who did this to you?!" His voice grew louder as I could tell anger was brewing in his soul. He pulled my in closer, but all I could do was stare into his concerned eyes. "Shannon!" He spoke again. Tears stung my eyes once again as I began to cry. I still didn't respond to him, but instead, I pulled him closer to me and wrapped my arms around his torso. He was tense at first, but eased into the embrace as I continued to cry. His fingers began to run through my hair slowly as we continued to hug in silence.
I had never felt safer in my life, than in this moment with him.
"Shannon, please, tell me who did this to you," he whispered calmly as he pulled me in tighter.
"M-My father," I cried quietly as I pulled away from him. Anger rushed over me again as I walked over to Ashton's bed and sat down quickly. "I-I don't understand w-what I did wrong," I spoke as I ran my fingers through my hair in frustration. Ashton sighed and sat down beside me.
"You did nothing wrong, your dad is a fucking coward to take out his anger on his own daughter," he whispered as he reached out to hold my hand. His fury started to show through as he spoke up, "I swear to god if I see him-"
"Ash, no," I said quickly. "Please don't" I begged as I scooted closer to him.
"Babe-"
"Ash, please," I begged. "If you d-do something, he'll just do this again, and again," I whispered. His eyes softened as he looked into my eyes.
"You deserve better than this," he said softly as he pulled me closer to him. "I'm so sorry."
I felt his lips connect with my forehead as he continued to pull me in. I started to calm down as my tears dried. I took a deep breath and slowly pulled away from his embrace, his eyes focused on me as I spoke up.
"Can I stay with you for a while," I mumbled.
"Yes, of coarse," he responded quickly. The room fell silent for a moment as we glanced into each others eyes. Ashton suddenly cleared his throat and managed to speak once again. "I will never let anything happen to you again, you're safe with me."