Im gonna be
Hey guys! So, I missed writing this book, so I realized, why not make one last chapter? So here I am! And this may be long and there's another very IMPORTANT authors note at the end so please please please read.
(Idk this May or may not play your feels)
Carl's pov
I keep having dreams. They're mostly flashbacks...memories... Of Melissa. It's so hard to handle. I really feel for my dad. He's awoken almost every night because of me screaming or crying because of some dream.
I mean, it's been months. I should be getting over it, right?
Wrong.
I really miss her. Her backpack is still lying in the corner of my room. I've refused to open it, knowing that I'll break down again if I see something-anything-else that reminds me of her.
I took a breath and walked over to the brown bag. I sat down against the wall and set it on my lap. I debated on wether or not I should open it. I decided to and I slowly looked inside the bag, seeing her knife, gun, some clothes, a can of corn, and a bunch of other little things.
Over the past few months, a few people have died, making my current situation that much worse.
Daryl. He died the day after Melissa's would-have-been seventeenth birthday. I'm not sure if it was suicide or if he was just killed. Honestly, I don't want to know.
Eugene. Everyone had this little bit of knowledge that he wouldn't survive for very long, even if we were in Alexandria.
Tara. She went on a run and never came back. Dad found her as a walker soon after.
Noah. I'm not sure about how he died. But he was starting to become a close friend, so it hurt. Nobody wants to tell me how he died.
I picked up her knife. The same one that I had to use to end it for her. So she wouldn't turn. I sighed, looking at the name carved 'Dixon' at the side. There was still dried up blood on it.
I'm thinking suicide. Daryl is tough, but when it came down to Melissa dying, he lost it. He never wanted to come out of his house, he was always depressed, and he was the last Dixon left. I think he committed suicide.
I began to think about how me and Melissa could be married by now. We could be cuddled up together, playing with our hands and talking about whatever while we looked at the setting sun outside. I'd occasionally look at her ring and think about how lucky I am to have married such a perfect girl.
But that's just not the truth.
Because right now, I'm sitting in the corner of my bedroom, looking at the knife I used to stab her in the head and crying, thinking about how It was my job to protect her and how I failed to do so.
A knock on my door brought me out of my thoughts. I wiped my tears away harshly.
"Yea?" I asked. The door opened and Maggie walked in. She took a look at the knife, then at my red puffy eyes and sighed,
"Not again." She whispered. "Don't do it again." I shook my head.
"I'm just thinking. Don't worry. I told you I wouldn't do that again." I told her, playing with my shirt sleeve. She walked up to me and sat down in front of me, putting a hand on my knee.
"You really miss her, huh?" She asked. I nodded, looking back at the carving on the knife.
"She was too young. Too innocent. This is why I never wanted to grow attached to anyone. I knew this would end up happening." I said. "It happened with mom. Noah, Daryl, Tara, Shane, Beth, Hershel..." I sighed stopping.
"But when I met her, I didn't know what it was, but I knew that one day, I wanted to be with her. And when we got to the prison, I tried to push my feeling away but I couldn't. I knew I wanted to be with her but I knew something would happen, leaving just one of us alone and depressed. I didn't think about that when we started going out, though. I didn't want to. I wanted to just spend the rest of my life with her. But we were only fourteen and I guess things just fall apart overtime. Only about three years together. . . But it honestly felt like forever, you know? And now it just hurts to think that she's gone." I explained.
"I know how you feel, Hun. When I thought Glenn died I was the same way. My thoughts just took over and I let myself be alone." She told me.
"But Glenn came back. He wasn't dead and you're still married and living together... I watched her die. I ended it myself. It was real and I still remember seeing her get bit all the time. I have dreams about back at the prison. Where we were happy. I remember we would laugh and joke together, we would be cuddled up together and night, trying to keep warm in that freezing cold cell." I laughed slightly at the memories. "I remember when we both fell asleep outside and we woke up in the rain. I remember her birthday, the day I found that big red piano for her, the day we first kissed, the times we would just stand there and hug for however long we wanted to because that meant more than words. I remember everything clear as day and that's why I miss her. We were so happy. And now look at us. One of us is gone and the other one wants to be." I said, not wiping away the tears that fell from my eyes.
"Oh, Carl..." She said sympathetically. "I remember seeing you both so happy together. Whenever you two were apart, both of you weren't your happy selves. But you have to keep living and be the person Melissa would want you to be. That's what she would want. What do you want?" She asked softly.
"I want to be dead." I mumbled, twirling the knife in my hand.
"But that's not what Melissa would want-"
"Melissa's dead. And you need to leave." I Said. She sighed, standing up, and walking to my dad who was apparently standing at the door. They whispered some things and dad sighed as Maggie walked away.
He decided to leave me alone and walked away, keeping my door open. I looked at the knife in my hands.
I deserve this way more than Melissa did. I deserve to have this knife stabbed into my skull, ending it for me. I'll see Melissa again. I'll hug her again, hold her hands, just see her again. Hey, maybe I'll even see mom. And Daryl, Shane, Noah...Patrick, Beth, I'll probably see everyone again.
I brought the knife up to my chest. I looked up to the sky and shut my eyes lightly.
"See you soon." I whispered before feeling a sharp pain in my chest. I dropped the knife, not even using it.
What?
I fell to the ground with blood around me. I saw my dad running up to me, crying.
"Oh my god, no...no no no..." He cried, putting his hands over what seems to be a gunshot wound. I saw his gun dropped on the ground. "I'm so sorry...I'm so sorry, son." He cried. The burning in my chest seemed to fade as my vision blurred in and out. I weakly took my dad's hands off of my chest and giving him a weak smile.
"Thank you." I whispered. I felt my heart rate slow and my breathing weaken. "I love you, dad." I whispered with my last breath. I realized now that I'm gonna be dead. Me and Melissa are both dead. I now realized what I just did to my dad. Everyone.
Both of us are dead now and none of us want to be.
"CARL!" I heard my dad yell through sobs as the world faded out.
{Ha, and just as you thought it couldn't get any worse:)}
***
I woke up on a familiar bed. My bed in Alexandria? I thought I was dead...
I slightly moved my arm and noticed it was draped over something. I looked up and saw a figure on their side beside me. The room was quite dark, so I couldn't see. I looked down at my vest and noticed I didn't have the necklace or the gunshot wound.
"What..?" I mumbled. The figure beside me moved and sat up. I immediately noticed the blue eyes I fell in love with back at the prison.
"Melissa?" I whispered.
"Carl..." She whimpered, hugging me, resting her head in the crook of my neck. I stood there stunned for a while before hugging her.
"You were dead. I was dead." I whispered, crying. She chuckled lightly. I could tell she was crying.
"I'm not dead, baby. You were knocked out by falling down the stairs like the clumsy person you are and you were in a coma or something for months. The doctor kept checking up on you, though. You kept mumbling my name. I didn't know what to do." She said.
I began to remember when I slipped rushing down the stairs and hitting my head on the step.
I hugged her tighter.
"I had a dream you were bit. I had to end It. Your dad died the day after your seventeenth birthday. My dad accidentally shot me. I thought I was dead." He cried. "I thought you were dead."
I looked at her. I wiped the tears from her eyes and gently put my hands on her face. I looked into her blue eyes and she looked into mine. I quickly leans in and connected our lips. I heard her slightly chuckle into the kiss, making me smile. I never thought I'd be able to do this again.
We broke apart and she laughed for a second, wiping my tears away. I smiled, still having my hands on the sides of her face gently.
"I love you so much, Melissa Dixon." I whispered. She smiled.
"I love you too, Carl Grimes." She whispered. I smiled and kissed her again before hugging her.
***
"We all heard about your dream. We heard you last night." Dad said.
"Did we wake you guys up? Sorry." I shrugged. I stopped washing dishes and looked out the window, seeing Melissa talking across the street with Enid. She's the girl from Jessie's house. We'll, they weren't really talking-they we're mostly reading books. I looked at dad.
"Remember when I talked to Daryl about marrying Melissa?" I asked. Michone and dad both looked at me, smirking.
"Yea." Michone said.
"I was wondering if I could go on a run later." I said.
"Run for what?" Daryl walked in. I jumped, making dad and michone laugh. Dad walked up to Daryl and whispered something to him. He looked at me and began walking towards me. I backed up and gulped. He put his hand out and I closed my eyes, moving my head. He patted my shoulder and laughed.
"Son, let's go." He chuckled. I let out a breath and nodded. Dad smiled and dried his hands off.
"Okay. Maggie, you wanna come with me, Carl and Daryl on a run?" Dad asked. Maggie nodded.
***
"What about this one? Maggie, I don't know what I'm doing." I sighed. She laughed, looking around the jewellers some more. "And I missed her seventeenth birthday so I have to make it that much better." I stressed. "What if she doesn't like the one I get? God, is this how stressful it is for everyone?" I sighed, looking around for a perfect ring.
"Carl, she'll love whatever you get her. Relax a bit, would you?" She chuckled. I walked over to her.
"You find anything?" I asked.
"Yes. I found this beautiful necklace, see?" She said, holding it out for me to see. I sighed. "Carl, it's gotta be from you. It makes it even more special." She told me.
I sighed and looked around. I saw one that looked perfect. I walked over to the display and broke the glass with my gun. I took out the ring and looked at it.
"You think she'll like this?" I asked, holding it out for her to see. She gasped and picked it up to look at it.
"It's amazing." She gushed, giving it back to me. I nodded and sighed.
"Nervous?" She asked. I nodded, looking at the ring.
"I mean, yea we're only seventeen but it's still not too young, right?" I asked.
"Well I mean it's up to you, Carl. There isn't much time for waiting around in this world. And people got married at your age before this. Stop worrying." She chuckled. I took a breath and nodded.
"I'm gonna be married."
---
HAHAHA YOU THOUGHT SHE WAS DEAD!
I'm so mean I love it.
Okay okay so I was thinking...
Should I make a sequel or should I just continue writing on this book? In other words-should I just continue writing this on a different/new book or should I just keep on writing and continue writing with this.
Okay so I just missed this and I decided to go with my first Idea and make you think they died, but in the end Carl was only dreaming because I'm an evil person.
So see you NEXT TIME:))
I also just posted a new chandler Riggs story called Wallflower idk I think it's gonna be cool.