[08]
i hadn't gone back to our spot in a week. i was too afraid i'd show up, and he'd be sitting with that girl again. but as i said, it's none of my business.
i still i needed to get out of the house. things were getting worse at home between my parents and i didn't want to be here anymore.
i decided to ball up, throw away that fear, and go.
-
he was sitting there, on his phone. he was sitting alone.
i barely made a sound, yet he looked up at me right away. he stared at me without expression before motioning for me to sit down.
"hi." i said, taking a seat next to him.
"hey."
"i'm sorry." i said almost too quickly.
he looked at me, confused. "why are you sorry?"
i was sorry. i was sorry, because me coming to meet him for however long he stayed, was becoming a normal thing for us, and i left him alone. i was surprised he wasn't angry with me, as he seems like the type to become angry easily. "for not.. not coming." i held my breath hoping he'd say 'that's okay' and move on.
"you don't have to be sorry." jonghyun said, his voice sounding a little softer than usual. "i know that your life can be a little restricting, so i understand."
i felt one hundred times better.
although i felt better, i was still curious of his relationship with that girl. men and women could have platonic relationships, but that wasn't always the case. i didn't want to ask him or even bring that up. it would make things a bit weird.
jonghyun placed an arm around my shoulder, scooting hid body closer to me. i felt warm. this is the closest to any type of affection i've gotten from anyone in forever. i looked up at jonghyun, who was looking right back at me. "if you need to talk to me about anything, you can." he said, giving with a reassuring look. "unless you don't want to. that's fine too."
a gave him a small smile, and rested my head on his shoulder. it was nice to be comfortable like this. to be able to be close like this.
it was quiet for a minute, the sound of the wind being the only thing heard.
"rina, why didn't you say hi to me?" he blurted out, breaking the peaceful silence. "what do you mean jonghyun?"
"the other day, you walked right past me without saying a word. you were wearing my scarf you know. you're even it wearing now."
so he did recognize me.
"i didn't see you."
"are you sure? i was with my sister. i had a it's hard to miss me since you see me a lot."
"it's dark. i can't see you that well. how could i recognize you in the light?"
"don't lie to me. you sound stupid."
i felt stupid. that was his sister, and i was worrying for absolutely no reason. that didn't mean he doesn't have someone else i don't know about.
jonghyun paused for ten seconds before looking at me with yet another smirk. "you thought that was someone else to me, didn't you." his smile got bigger.
"no! of course not."
"sure rina, whatever you say."
although it was cold, my cheeks were hot. he could tell i was lying to him, and i was embarrassed. this was amusing to him.
he removed his arm from my shoulders, and stood up. i was sad he was leaving so quickly, but another part of me wanted him to go so i could stop being embarrassed.
"goodni-"
i was interrupted by him pulling me up and walking to me over to the train station. "come with me."