Russian Roulette

And I will become quite a household name
with nothing in soul and with nothing behind.
And shoulders will burn in exorbitant shame,
and eyes due to vices became deadly blind.

I know it. I feel it. I am too much old,
because of my dreams and my usual longing.
But someday I can and step over threshold.
My pride will be killed. Former me will be crumbling.

Tatiana Evtushenko, June 2023